send

 "as the Father sent Me, 

       I also send you." 

                   -john 20:21

today our worship service and a fellowship meal following were focused on a mission field that was over ten years in the making from our church.  i thoroughly enjoyed hearing the story of the history and prayers that were sowed into this mission field.

i know my purpose as a mother is to prepare my boys for their mission works...as disciples...as husbands...as fathers...as followers and believers.
most days i feel utterly inadequate for this task.

today, i felt pangs of my failure when my oldest went ahead of us to pick out seats for us at the fellowship luncheon.  with a choice of a dozen long tables with 30+ seats and a handful of small tables with 3-4 seats, he chose a segregated table for 3.  i felt i had failed him by my propensity towards introversion.

i have to fight the urge to become a hermit of sorts on a daily basis. but i know that in order to step out for God, i must be bold and seek out relationships.  i have to show and teach my boys this.  it means overcoming that desire for seclusion.  

part of the chronicle of the featured mission field at church is the song, "oceans," by hillsong. 

the highlighted words below from the song, mean a great deal to me.


And I will call upon Your name
 And keep my eyes above the waves
 When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine

Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand
Will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You've never failed and You won't start now

our pastor included matthew 16:18 in his teaching today.   

it is imperative and reassuring to remember the declaration of this verse, since it is horrifyingly apparent in this age, we are facing the "gates of hell" around the world.

the victory is WON! 

no matter what circumstances seem to show.... 

satan shall NOT, can NOT, will NOT prevail.

dinner:

leftovers (we have leftovers on the sabbath to minimize work)

currently reading:
2 blogs with lenten devotionals:         www.shereadstruth.com and www.aholyexperience.com

1 john 1

matthew 16

various psalms

the secret thoughts of an unlikely convert

24/6

today grateful for:

sunshine

worship

worship music and worship teams & choirs

God's truth

God's faithfulness

God's provision

the WORD

the sabbath

clean water

laughter

snowy morning

no matter how dark the shadows or how deep the void looks in the night, the morning always comes.   

there is persistently hope.   

dawn seems most vivid in the winter.    

perhaps, when we ache for the warmth, the morning sun is brightest.

a new day brings new assurance and expectation.    

i was not lost in the abyss of the night.    

though i could not see in the dark, he never left me.   

even though i felt abandoned, He waited beside me.  

He lingered and guarded, waiting for my next move.   

waiting for me to speak His name or reach out my thoughts toward Him.   

the sunrise is the brilliant, circadian reminder that…

Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed,                                Because His compassions fail not.                                                              They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness.                      “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul,  “Therefore I hope in Him!”                 The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, To the soul who seeks Him.          It is good that one should hope and wait quietly                                          For the salvation of the Lord.
              lamentations 3:22-26

breakfast:
oatmeal

coffee

currently reading:
2 blogs with lenten devotionals:         www.shereadstruth.com and www.aholyexperience.com

jeremiah 

lamentations 3

today grateful for:
a snowy morning

warmth

coffee

clean water

safety

His provision  

good health

the WORD

fire

the sun

The classroom of suffering

Below is an exert from the devotion I was reading this morning that I felt was worth repeating. The source is Voice of the Martyrs.

History, however, shows that people with the mere position of power are ineffective without the inner strength to carry out their duties. In contrast, God targets our inner strength through the presence of the Holy Spirit. Suffering is his classroom, where he teaches us what it is like to be strong. We are able to endure more than we imagined. We are bold beyond our means. You may feel as though your sufferings have made you weak. Ask God to show you how they can, in fact, make you stronger. Flex your muscles. You will see you are stronger than you think.

Suffering is something I struggle to face with inner strength. I do not always turn to God as quickly as I know I should. One of these days I will post some of the word studies from the Bible that I have done regarding suffering. Suffering is something all humans have experienced, however it really hit that raw home place for me when I became a widow. My "muscles" are "sore" but stronger in this classroom of suffering. What will I be doing in His name with this muscle strength? When this question came to mind, I immediately thought of my friend, Jill, who is going to Uganda in February to minister to other widows. To know what you have "trained" for gives you strength as well.